our world has erupted.
after months of sheltering, the death of a black man in the united states has created a volcano of expression.
certainly there is violence. certainly there is anger and pain.just as certainly there are creative thinkers who see this moment as a pivot point, a moment of potential for great change….a shift in policing, a change toward a green economy, a moment where centuries of inequity might be shifted.
as elders we play an important role in this shift. while we may not be on the streets (though some of us certainly are!), we too are part of the change. we can hold the still point.
“At the still point of the turning world. Neither flesh nor fleshless; Neither from nor towards; at the still point, there the dance is, But neither arrest nor movement. And do not call it fixity, Where past and future are gathered. Neither movement from nor towards, Neither ascent nor decline. Except for the point, the still point, There would be no dance, and there is only the dance.”
t.s. elliott tells us that there is a place from which everything moves and evolves, everything is potential. from the still point all is possible, not fixed. the still point is the present moment into which the dance unfolds. the still point is the place from which consciousness changes, from where we perceive, understand, act differently than we did before. the still point is transformative. at the still point we find our activism…be that on the streets or as spiritual activists.from here elders can find their power along with the youngers who have taken to the streets, at risk of their lives, not only from police brutality but also from the brutality of a sometimes deadly disease. they are acting for us all and they stand on the wisdom of their elders. we can hold the space for their dance. this is a legacy all of us can provide, whether we have children/grandchildren or not.this is the space we hold where “past and future are gathered”.may we use it well.
A woman dying there asked him about that book and Ostaseski explained the tradition of Zen monks who on the day of their death wrote a poem to convey the essential truth discovered in their life.
This woman, named Sono, said she would like to write her own and did so, asking it to be pinned to her bedclothes after she died and then be cremated with her.Here is her poem:Don’t just stand there with your hair turning gray,soon enough the seas will sink your little island.So while there is still the illusion of time,set out for another shore.No sense packing a bag.You won’t be able to lift it into your boat.Give away all your collections.Take only new seeds and an old stick.Send out some prayers on the wind before you sail.Don’t be afraid.Someone knows you’re coming.An extra fish has been salted.-Mona (Sono) Santacroce (1928–1995)when i read this quotation is was struck by the immediacy of the words, the authenticity of the lessons...both those she learned and those she is teaching me, now, as a way to live. i'm sure the depths have not yet been plumbed.(sadly, i didn't make a note of where i found this poem, so i can't attribute it. if anyone knows where i can find it, please contact me at felice.rhiannon@gmail.com. thank you.)
the reading for 18 may challenged and inspired me. i share it with you here.
is this cough a symptom? should i be tested? am i now allowed to visit a friend in a park, maintaining physical distance? when will i be able to go to a cafe again? government guidelines don’t often offer much clarity and sometimes they might go counter to our personal, inner guidelines.the chaos caused by anxiety and grief surrounds us too, regardless of our personal experience. these painful emotions are in the atmosphere around us. and many of us might have had direct experience of fear and grieving.
many of us might have lived through a bout of the illness and recovered. will those who have recovered be the same as they were? will their health be compromised? how do they feel now about the pandemic?so much is unknown and yet there is the potential to be willing to share the confusion, our own and that of others, and to be part of the community of sentient beings. willingness is all that is asked of us in this vow/prayer. we are not asked to be perfect or to be enlightened…only to be willing to be human and serve other beings.
elders have the unique opportunity to take the eagle’s eye view, to see the big picture of service, compassion and understanding. we know confusion and chaos. we’ve seen it before. we’ve lived with it before. this is not to minimise the current situation. rather elders can bring our experience of the past into the present and open our hearts to willingness. we can step outside our immediate situation and see a broader, wider picture.we can set an example of living with our own chaos and confusion and hold the hand (virtually) of those who are suffering. we can walk side by side and share. we can work humbly to aid and elevate others in whatever way we can.
it was a wednesday, the day there is a weekly social club in the spacious, well-appointed common space.
the neighbour asked me is i attended. when i said “no” she commented, “nor do i. they think they’re old. i don’t think i’m old.”what is it about the word ‘old’ that causes us to recoil, to distance ourselves from others?
why do we dread claiming that identity? in our culture, old is equal to useless, without redeeming qualities. my neighbour’s response to a vital, social activity typifies this cultural paradigm.and perhaps, more importantly, she is denying her own reality. though i don’t know exactly how old she is, i would venture to guess, she has 70+ years of life experience. that’s old by anyone’s standards. she is healthy, engaged and lively...and old.
we have been conditioned to believe that young is valuable, is desirable.we, who are no-longer young, are not.they, who are not-yet-old, inhabit a world that is often bereft of elder role models. they don’t know the potential freedom of elderhood. they don’t know the avenues for growth that exist in the life of the older.most research shows that people in their later years are happier and more content than those younger. we somehow believe that the young and middle years are the epitome of life’s riches. current studies show otherwise.and yet the cultural view of olders persists. it is up to us to change that...by living our potential regardless of our age, by enjoying opportunities to grow, by finding meaning and purpose in our elderhood itself.
they are words of an elder, though i don’t know how many years of life experience she holds. they are words of strength, compassion and wisdom. they are words which can serve as a beacon of light on the darker days of this pandemic time. they are words to inspire our resilience, our authenticity, our kindness to ourselves and others.may they inspire you today.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~our mission is to plant ourselves at the gates of hope –
not the prudent gates of Optimism, which are somewhat narrower;nor the stalwart, boring gates of Common Sense;nor the strident gates of Self-Righteousness, which creak on shrill on angry hinges(people cannot hear us there; they cannot pass through);nor the cheerful, flimsy garden gate of “everything is gonna be all right.”but a different, sometimes lonely place, the place of truth-telling,
about your own soul first of all and its condition,the place of resistance and defiance,the piece of ground from which you see the worldboth as it is and as it could be,as it will be;
the place from which you glimpse not only struggle,but joy in the struggle.and we stand there, beckoning and calling,telling people what we are seeing,asking people what they see.
to quote newburn,
for many of us, this points to children and grand-children taking up their roles as we move into a different time. it is our role to hold the lamp of experience for them and those generations, whether or not we have children and grand-children.now is a time when we can reflect on our values and pass them on to create a world that is more compassionate, more equitable, more just. it is a time when we can actively step up to this role as guide and sounding board. it is a time to act in whatever way we are able.(p.s not being a tweeter, i had to look up #i<3u2. for those who also don’t know what it means…i love you too, the third and fourth digits resemble a heart lying on its side.)